


And I'm Never Gonna Dance Again (Guilty Feet Have Got No Rhythm)

by theprincesjester



Series: And I'm Never Gonna Dance Again (Guilty Feet Have Got No Rhythm) [1]
Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: But it's okay, F/F, M/M, Protective Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, and all i could think about was this, and triss and jaskier insist on going along, and work together, because i accidentally got more invested, but again that's fine, i have no explanation for most of this honestly, i listened to careless whisper one (1) time, in here too, in their friendship than i planned, let him love his friends, looks like we've got some, one of those detective movies au, overusing italics!, triss and jaskier are friends again, unfortunately ciri did Not make it into this one, where geralt and yennefer are detectives, which. well, yeah - Freeform, yennefer and geralt are On A Case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-02-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:15:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22539976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theprincesjester/pseuds/theprincesjester
Summary: “Time can never mend the careless whispers of a good friend… to the heart and mind ignorance is kind, there's no comfort in the truth: pain is all you'll find,” And this time Geralt does look up, he’s not an idiot, he knows what he means with all of this, and he takes a long drink. Yennefer sighs from where she is next to him.----In which Yennefer and Geralt are detectives, and Jaskier enjoys almost-taunting Geralt.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion & Triss Merigold, Jaskier | Dandelion & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Triss Merigold/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Series: And I'm Never Gonna Dance Again (Guilty Feet Have Got No Rhythm) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1628539
Kudos: 43





	And I'm Never Gonna Dance Again (Guilty Feet Have Got No Rhythm)

**Author's Note:**

> i might Possibly do more with this au, but i really don't expect to do too much else with it (if i think of Actual Plot Stuff i'll probably add onto it but i'm not sure yet) 
> 
> this is my [tumblr](https://respect-doesnt-make-history.tumblr.com/),,, i guess, if you want to scream about these characters with me (and also question some of my decisions) 
> 
> Alternatively titled: Why I Don't Listen To "The Archive" And Write Anymore (Except We All Know That's A Lie)

The man onstage took a deep breath before plunging into the saxophone solo, and Geralt almost cracked a smile at how _well_ the whole situation fit, really. He would’ve laughed at how almost **_cruel_ **it was. 

But he didn’t. He barely even _looked up_ at the man that he recognised--of _course_ he recognised him, he had a face that just _screamed_ “ **_remember me, you’ve seen me before_ ** ” but Geralt just _couldn’t place where_ . Or, rather, he didn’t _want_ to admit it, _not in this moment_ , not _here_ and **not** _right now_ , not with _all the chances that were being taken_. 

He sighed and rubbed a hand down his face, flagging the bartender down as the man onstage began to _sing_ , and _fuck_ , Geralt _hated_ the **_entire situation_ **. 

“ _I feel so unsure, as I take your hand and lead you to the dancefloor_ ,” the man onstage closed his eyes as he sang, playing his guitar along with it, and Geralt let his eyes flick up, trying to _comprehend_ how **_one man_ ** could _play_ so many instruments at one time, _let alone_ **_hold_ ** _them all_ , and was satisfied upon seeing that the man had his saxophone sitting to his side, the guitar his main focus. 

He sighed as the bartender slid him his drink, wrapping a hand around the glass. 

“Well?” Yennefer looked over at him, the collar of her jacket _up_ and violet eyes full of a **_Something_ **that Geralt could hardly place. 

“ _I’m never gonna dance again, guilty feet have got no rhythm--though it’s easy to pretend, I know you’re not a fool,_ ” Geralt didn’t even _look up_ at the man as he sang this time, only giving his partner a half-hearted grunt in response. “ _Should’ve known better than to cheat a friend and waste the chance that I’d been given… so I’m never gonna dance again, the way I danced with you._ ” And this time Geralt can _feel_ the eyes on him, blue eyes _staring straight at him_ , almost fucking _smug_ , and there’s a **_Something_ ** that _twists_ in his gut and he’s _so, so close_ to saying that he was _done_ , to saying ‘ **_fuck it_ **’ and getting this over with. 

Yennefer touched his arm. “Geralt?” and her eyes seem--they seem full of **_Something_ ** , again, and Geralt _almost_ thinks it’s _concern_ , or maybe **_pity_ ** , and _that_ idea makes him want to bare his teeth and tell her to _leave him alone_. 

“ _Time can never mend the careless whispers of a good friend… to the heart and mind ignorance is kind, there's no comfort in the truth: pain is all you'll find_ ,” And this time Geralt _does_ look up, he’s _not an idiot_ , he _knows_ what he means with _all of this_ , and he takes a long drink. Yennefer sighs from where she is next to him. 

“I know you don’t… particularly like this,” she eventually says. He grunts in agreement. “But they’ll be okay, they know what they’re doing, and we’re right here.” She puts a hand on his arm in an attempt to _comfort_ him, and _then he’s singing the chorus again_ , and _then_ he’s playing his fucking _saxophone solo again_ , and Geralt _tenses_ , _eyes scanning the area,_ and he can almost _hear_ Jaskier’s deep breath before he starts to play. Triss is on the drums, and she appears to be enjoying it _quite a lot_ , looking over at the two her own fair share of times, even winking when Geralt and Yennefer both look up at her. 

And then, once that song is over, Jaskier stands from where he was sitting on the stool, taking the saxophone off of his shoulders, pulling it over his head and setting it in a case before grabbing his water bottle to take a _long drink_ , and **_fuck it_** , _Geralt will stare all he wants_ , he _needs_ the _comfort of knowing_ that Jaskier and Triss are _still okay_ , _that they haven’t gotten hurt_ , not yet, and when Jaskier finishes he looks over at Geralt and _smiles_ , _fucking smiles and then winks, to top it all off_ , and Geralt feels a **Something** , _something_ ** _protective_** _,_ curl in his stomach, and he _knows_ that he’ll _damn_ ** _himself_** if _anything_ happens to Jaskier (or Triss), _especially_ while they’re on the makeshift stage. 

And then Jaskier is grabbing a fucking cello, and next to Geralt, Yennefer smiles, shaking her head at how easily he just seems to decide to pick up the instrument and play it while he sings. 

“Alright, now for our _next_ one… yeah, I _do_ plan on holding this giant thing for the entire song, let’s see how well this goes,” and Jaskier stares _right at Geralt as he says it_ , almost _laughing_ , and Triss smacks out a beat on her sticks, a beat that Jaskier _picks up_ and starts to _keep_ with his bouncing leg, one that the man behind the curtain evidently picks up as he starts out the song, and Geralt is almost _mesmerized_ as Jaskier _drags the bow across the strings of the instrument he’s practically hugging to himself_ , legs _wrapped_ around it in what Geralt is _almost positive_ Jaskier has told him is the _wrong position to be holding it in_ , but he doesn’t seem to care as he starts the song, and it looks so _easy_ for him to _sit there_ **_and_** play the instrument and then to start singing, “ _Oh I, I just died in your arms tonight… it must’ve been something you said, I just died in your arms tonight…_ ”

And then the rest of the makeshift band that he and Triss have gathered together are joining in, Triss still on her drums and keeping the beat, Jaskier _stilling his leg as she joined_ . It was a simple show of _trust_ and one that Geralt can recognise _easily_ , something that went to show _how much he trusted her to keep him on track after everything that had happened_. 

And Jaskier is no longer looking at him, eyes wandering around the room, before bouncing back to where he and Yennefer are sat, offering the two of them an _almost-conspiratorial smile_ that Yennefer returns _easily_. 

And it’s almost as if _that_ action alone **_snaps_ ** Geralt _back to his senses_ , _reminds_ him _what the hell he’s supposed to be doing here_ , and _why_ Geralt and Yennefer are letting their respective partners be put in _possible almost-danger_ , the two being _bait for a trap that may or may not work._

At _this_ point, it was a matter of _timing_ , and the _hope_ that _maybe_ , they had all been _wrong_ about the day that _things were supposed to go to shit._

And _in that moment,_ Geralt wanted _nothing more than to call it all off_ , or for it to be a false alarm, or something, **_anything_ ** to ensure that Jaskier (and Triss) weren’t in much danger, that protective **Something** _curling in his gut and rearing its head again_ as he scanned around the room for any potential threats. 

And then the song is _over_ , _much quicker_ than Geralt _thought_ it would be, he had _barely been paying attention_ , and he waves the bartender over again, and Jaskier is putting the cello down beside himself and standing, grabbing at a guitar that’s being offered to him, turning behind himself to say something to Triss and then _laughing_ , _they’re both laughing and smiling and it almost seems as if everything’s safe and okay_ , and Geralt wants _nothing_ more than to pretend that _it’s just the case, that there’s nothing to worry about_. Yennefer puts her hand on his shoulder, this time, violet eyes meeting gold as she searches his face. 

“They’re going to be okay,” she says it firmly, with so much _conviction_ that it almost seems as if _there’s no way she couldn’t be right_ , and he nods almost numbly, grunting, watching as Jaskier says something to Triss again, and she nods, and he goes back to the microphone. 

“Alright, so we’ve only got a couple more we’re doing… don’t get too sad, there’s supposed to be some other act, from what I hear. We’d like to dedicate this song to two of the most interesting people we know,” and Jaskier is _smiling_ , **_dazzling_ ** , _eyes full of mirth as the_ \--the instrument Geralt isn’t sure of starts to play, and _Jaskier is gripping his guitar,_ and _if Geralt wasn’t who he was then he would’ve missed the way his knuckles turned white_ he was gripping it with _such fear_ , and Geralt had to resist the urge to go up there and offer his support. He would just have to stay the silent guard from where he was, at the bar. And then suddenly Yennefer is _shaking her head_ , not looking at the stage. It takes a moment for it to hit Geralt, too, but _when it does_ he almost _laughs_ again, rolling his eyes. 

“Those _assholes_ ,” 

Yennefer shrugs, barely offering a response to what he said. 

“ _...the moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation_ ,” Jaskier is singing, and then Triss takes the melody from him from where she’s seated at her drums. 

“ _I stopped an old man along the way,_ ” 

And then they’re singing together, “ _Hoping to find some old forgotten words or ancient melodies… he turned to me as if to say,_ **_‘hurry boy, it’s waiting there for you’_ ** _; It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you, there’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do!_ ” 

And Geralt tunes it out again as his eyes scan the room again, having already heard Jaskier’s spiel on the Toto song. 

“Do you think we came to the wrong bar?” Yennefer finally asks. Geralt grunts before shaking his head. 

“No. I think we got lucky, tonight. We should still stay next door, just in case, but I don’t think that fucker’s coming around here yet,” and Yennefer nods in agreement with his words. 

“I think they’re almost done, we should go help them pack up,” she leaves the “ _and make sure they don’t get shanked, or something worse_ ,” out, and Geralt stands, showing his agreement. The two make their way to the area that had been cleared out and labeled as “ **Backstage** ”, _shoving_ their way through the crowd and finding a spot to stand that’s _just behind the curtain_ so the audience can’t see them. 

“Well… I think that’s it. Thank you for having us, everyone!” Jaskier’s voice sounds **_almost_ ** _light_ , _excited_ , still _brimming full_ of energy from the night, but Geralt and even Yennefer can detect the _worry_ that plagues it, just _barely hidden_ behind his exhilaration. 

And then Triss is _standing_ , Jaskier shifting the guitar so it’s on his back as the two meet each other at her drumset and checking up on each other, Jaskier _grabbing her arm as they made their retreat backstage_ , the physical contact _reassuring_ him that she was still _alive and okay_. 

“Geralt!” And then Geralt is almost _knocked backwards with the force with which the musician throws himself at him_ , arms wrapping around his neck as he hugs him. After a bit of hesitation, Geralt hugs him back, and then Jaskier is pulling back, rocking on his heels. 

Triss and Yennefer are doing their own checkups on each other, Triss pulling her into a hug and kissing her head and then her cheek and then her lips, grabbing one of her hands as if to make sure that she really is there. 

“So… no one died,” Yennefer says once they’ve _all_ reassured each other that _they’re all alright_ , and Geralt nods, Jaskier looking up from the ground, blue eyes almost sad, _concerned_ , as he rubs his hands together. Geralt leans back. 

“That, they didn’t,” Jaskier confirms. 

Triss sighs. “So you’re no closer to figuring it out?” 

“Well… we were planning on still staying next door,” Geralt shrugs. “If that’s fine.” 

And Jaskier nods, nudging Geralt’s knee with his own and giving him a faint smile. If the situation had been _just a bit different_ , maybe he would’ve thrown a _wink_ in there, _somewhere_ , but now _definitely_ did not call for it. 

“Do we want to stay just a little bit longer? It’s still only… about eight, right?” Jaskier checks his watch as he speaks, and Geralt nods. 

“That’d probably work,” Yennefer actually _agrees_ with him, and Triss leans against her in an almost-hug. 

“Alright. So we stay for another hour or so, see if someone tries to stab us or some shit, and then go to the hotel. Can’t be that bad, right?” Jaskier _does_ smile, _wobbly but_ **_there_** , providing some comfort in the hour of need. 

“Essentially,” Geralt shrugs. “Don’t know that it’s that simple, but… yeah.” 

And then the group splits up, agreeing to meet back up in one of the two hotel rooms they’ve gotten booked _just for this occasion_ , and Jaskier is _attempting_ to be bubbly again, bopping his head to the music, even if it’s not as energetic as he usually was, and he grabbed Geralt’s hand and pulling him to the edge of the space that can _barely_ be called a dancefloor, made specifically for the recent occasions the bar had been holding, and trying to pull him into a jumpy dance as _Invisible Touch_ ended. And then _Pour Some Sugar On Me_ started, and Jaskier was _smiling_ , _wide and mostly-genuine_ , and Geralt felt something **_warm_ **curl in his chest as he gave him a small smile in return, almost shaking his head and laughing when Jaskier waved the two girls over to them again. 

Not too surprisingly, Triss nearly dragged Yennefer over, the group seeming to still be a little hesitant to make a final split knowing about the possibility of a murderer on the loose. 

“ _Pour some sugar on me, oooh, in the name of love_ !” Jaskier and Triss sing it together, and they’re almost _bouncing_ , trying to regain energy. “ _I’m hot, sticky sweet, from my head to my feet, yeah_!” 

And Yennefer and Geralt cross their arms, watching as their respective partners attempt to lighten the mood. 

“ _You got the peaches, I got the cream, sweet to taste, saccharine! 'Cause I'm hot, say what, sticky sweet... from my head, my head, to my feet_ ,” 

And then Jaskier’s face is twisting up into something _strange_ , nose _wrinkling_ and eyebrows _furrowed_ as he looks at the trio, almost considering something. 

“Are you alright?” Yennefer asks, almost smiling, but also legitimately concerned for her just-barely-friend. 

“Yeah, I just…” his voice dropped down to a whisper. “This guy’s got some strange kinks.” he eventually got out, and Yennefer rolled her eyes. 

“Better or worse than Tom Jones?” Triss prompts. Jaskier shrugs, almost as if to say that they’re both fairly bad. 

“I think that’s enough… what all have you had? For both of you,” Yennefer cuts in, tone still somewhat light as Triss pushes her way close and under her arm so she’s in a half-hug. 

“Excuse you, we actually haven’t had anything, tonight, for fear of having our guts exposed later, so…” Jaskier defends, and Triss shrugs, nodding in agreement. 

“I’m sure,” Yennefer almost teases him, and he sighs. 

“Anyways. We’re going to go ahead and go, we’ll see you two tomorrow,” and then Yennefer and Triss are walking away, arm in arm, and Geralt has enough faith in Yennefer’s abilities to protect both of them. 

“We should probably head back soon, too,” Geralt tells Jaskier, interrupting his train of thought as the other man started to bop his head to the next song. 

“Oh, alright, but mostly because I don’t want to get murdered,” and then Jaskier takes Geralt’s hand in his own, and he drags him out as _I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)_ really starts, and he’s humming it as they walk out of the bar and make their way to the hotel, the song still just barely loud enough to be heard as they made their way back to their room. 

And Geralt almost cracked a smile at how _well_ the whole situation fit, really, as Jaskier smiled at him and kissed him, and Geralt could hear the song still, just barely, and Jaskier was still humming along with it, pulling away for a couple lines, “ _I'm gonna be the man who comes back home with you, I'm gonna be the man who's coming home with you… But I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more just to be the man who walks a thousand miles to fall down at your door_ ,” 

And really, he figured that they would all be alright, between the four of them. They’d make it through it, the group had certainly made it through worse, and that thought alone was enough to make Geralt just-barely smile as he watched Jaskier. 

And there’s a **Something** _warm_ , almost _protective_ , curling in his chest again, and Geralt finds that he doesn’t mind it, much.


End file.
